Half empty or half full?

Since I got the call from my ex colleague abt Jhay... I feel that anything and anyone can leave anytime...

What touched me the most was ur understanding... u didn't ask me anything but jst hugged me as I cried. I'm glad to have found such an understanding man... who knows when exactly I need ur hug... and today... u came all d way to see me for lunch... almost feels like the beginning of our relationship when everything was flowery and nice...

Thank you dear... for u have been most wonderful lately... I will work hard to keep it that way... I love you...

I'm sorry

I'm sorry for doubting you.

Dear mermaid...

"You aren't going to be his 1st, his last, or his only... he’s loved before; he will love again. But if he loves you now, what else matters? He’s not perfect - you’re not either. If he can make you laugh and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him and give him the most you can. He’s not going to be thinking about you every moment of the day, but he will give you a part of him that he knows YOU can break - his heart. So don’t hurt him, don’t change him, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than he can give. Smile when he makes you happy, let him know when he makes you mad and miss him when he’s not there. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always ONE guy that is perfect for you."

Reposting this to remind myself again and again not to give up during this tough time. To remind myself to enjoy the journey rather than to hope to reach the destination. To remind myself of all u have done... all d happiness we shared... and again... to remind myself not to give up...

For my sibeh sui bor

I just miss you so much, being away from you so so far away make me really miss your hugs
miss arguing with you :-P
miss can't help smilling when just after I drop you off and you get off my car, close the car door and when you look toward me... thinking you can't stop looking at me... until I realise you wasn't actually looking at me but you are just looking at your own reflection on the car glass windows admiring your own beauty... it's just crack me up :P hahaha... well this isn't a romantic way of putting things, but I really tickle me in a nice simple way and I miss you even more and it's just so nice to have the feeling of being love. Know for sure, even from a far, even being physically far a part, I am already own, I am already complete.
Knowing when I am being screwed by customer here due to some problem with the system, even it's not totally our fault and yet just has to take the blame, just the thought of you, the thought of having you love me, make all this shit bearable. I just so love you darling, my wifey!!!! I love you!!! I love you!!!! I love you!!!!

Dua Pui Ang dearest...

When things get so tough...
and all I wanna do is give up...
I think about how u always make me laugh...
With your fat belly and your smelly fart...

Thanks for every little wonderful things you have done for me... taking care of me... sharing your life with me and most of all... loving me...

I couldn't have smiled so wide and laughed so hard if it wasn't for you.

I love you hubby... now, future and eternally my hubby...

True Love...

Find arms that will hold you at your weakest, eyes that will see you at your ugliest, lips that will kiss you in both instances, and a heart that will love you at your worst. Only then will you have found your true love...

Day 1

There was nothing much to do at work... maybe I was just feeling kinda down to do much... mindfucking myself again... doing some comparison between my dear's past and present...

Just feel like knocking my own head sometimes... why do I let something that happened so long ago and before u met me get to me so much...

I kept reminding myself... what we share now means much much more... now that we are both more matured... and we are both so willingly to commit 100% to each other. If things with our pasts were so great.. it wudnt be left in the past... and this applies to me too...

Was chatting with both my exes... the 3 yrs one and the 7 mths one... both of them messaged me first. The 3 yrs one is still trying to get over his heart ache... he's over me... but he's jst not over the fact that he got hurted by someone... he's 29 this yr... maybe after calming his broken heart for 4-5 yrs.. he shud be at ur age and meet his special someone.

The 7 mths jerk has met someone new... suprisingly her name starts with E, she's my height and is very much like me. Rebound or fate? I don't even wanna find out....

All this mindfucking tears my heart apart... my hand was shivering cold and my heart was beating so fast... took a walk to the ladies and sat on the toilet throne and just thought to myself... hey... if everything goes well... we will be husband and wife in months... what past and what failed love can fight with that?

Darling I know I have been less than understanding sometimes... I hear what u say but refuse to hear you... I'm never ever gonna give u the u are too good for me therefore I dont deserve u kinda talk...

I deserve u and u deserve me... I'll just learn to appreciate you more and never ever give u a reason to walk away or give myself a reason to walk away. Darl... breaking up or divorce is not an option to us yea...

I miss you so damn much it feels like I lost a part of me... the heart feels empty and I just wanna go to bed at 9pm so that tomoro comes faster... and Thursday comes faster... I just don't want you to know how much I am missing you right now... don't want u to feel disturbed and not able to concentrate on ur work...

Darling I am so proud to be your girlfriend... and your loyal partner... I love u so much...

Gonna get a drink n get sleepy... until tomoro comes... missin u loads....

A letter to myself

Dear mermaid...

"You aren't going to be his 1st, his last, or his only... he’s loved before; he will love again. But if he loves you now, what else matters? He’s not perfect - you’re not either. If he can make you laugh and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him and give him the most you can. He’s not going to be thinking about you every moment of the day, but he will give you a part of him that he knows YOU can break - his heart. So don’t hurt him, don’t change him, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than he can give. Smile when he makes you happy, let him know when he makes you mad and miss him when he’s not there. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always ONE guy that is perfect for you."

Darling... you are my perfect guy.... love you and gonna miss you while u are away... I'll be good... pwomise =)

=)

Whenever life seems to drift you away from me, I can't help but cry. You've grown to be such a part of me that without you life is no more than a desperate sigh. They do say love comes and goes, and to that I disagree. So, here's my hand, take it and don't let go of me.

A Non Copy & Paste

I wake up every morning not believing my luck when I see you sleeping beside me... every single time I look at you I just can't resist caressing your face...

Thank you darling for all the wonderful wonderful happiness in the world you have showered me. Helping me around the house... taking care of me when I am sick and sweeping me off for a holiday when I needed one...

I love you so much it shakes the core of my heart...

I thank god every night before I go to bed for granting me my soulmate, the man I wish to spend the rest of my lfe with...

I'd've loved you anyway...

I would've loved you anyway; I'd do it all the same; not a second I would change, not a touch that I would trade. Even if I've known my heart would break, I'd've loved you anyway...

Love is..

Love is a decision not an emotion or feeling,
that if made from the heart will outlast anything...

- Raul and Samantha Juarez -

Us iii

In life, love is never planned nor does it happen for a reason, but when the love is real, it becomes your plan for life and your reason for living

Us ii

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but an entire lifetime to forget them

Us

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around.

You tell them things that you've never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you.

When something wonderful happens, you can't wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement.

They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself.
Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful.

There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around.

You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever.

Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it's like being young again. Colors seem brighter and more brilliant.

Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn't exist at all.

A phone call or two during the day helps to get you
through a long day's work and always brings a smile to your face.

In their presence, there's no need for continuous conversation, but you find you're quite content in just having them nearby.

Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon.

You open your heart knowing that there's a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.

You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that's so real it scares you.

You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end.

Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.

I Love You dearest...

3 words

I love you!

Why I love you

If you asked why I love you,
I would say
It’s the sway of your hips,
the soft and tenderness in your thighs.
It’s the lust in your full lips,
the love in your eyes.
It’s the softness of your skin,
the heat of your body.
It’s the twist in your walk;
it’s the sweetness in your talk.
It’s the way you love me
that makes me love you each day and more.

Dream

I must have done something good extremely great in my past lives, to be able to finally meet someone exactly like much better than whom I have always been dreaming of. I still can't believe it, it's just like a dream come true except that it's much better than that. If this is really just a dream, then I would never want to wake up and will forever live in this eternal dream.

The meaning

Epiphany
Enchanting smile

Lustered with Hope
Embodiment of beauty
Ethereal and
Never ending Love

Our Story

In a distant past
under the twinkling of the eternal stars
the reflection of crescent moon
descending gracefully upon
serene clear lake

In the vast expand of the prairie
we were lying down on our back
holding hands
on the dew glistening grass
listening to the whisper
of the midnight breeze
that we will meet and be whole again
and again
in this life and next lives
till the end of time

Reason I

You are the reason why I wake up every morning,
with a smile;
not unlike a silly kid
who has gotten a sweet candy,
carved on my face.

Have You Ever

(chorus)
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever,have you ever

Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything up to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start

(chorus)
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever,have you ever

Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all your life
You'd do just about anything to look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for that day
when they will care

(chorus)
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever,have you ever

What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby
What do I gotta say to get to your heart
To make you understand how I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
'Cuz baby I can't sleep

(repeat chorus twice)
Have you ever?

~~~ || ~~~

Yes, I miss you that much baby!

~~~ || ~~~

A Fairy Song

Over hill, over dale,
Thorough bush, thorough brier,
Over park, over pale,
Thorough flood, thorough fire!
I do wander everywhere,
Swifter than the moon's sphere;
And I serve the Fairy Queen,
To dew her orbs upon the green;
The cowslips tall her pensioners be;
In their gold coats spots you see;
Those be rubies, fairy favours;
In those freckles live their savours;
I must go seek some dewdrops here,
And hang a pearl in every cowslip's ear.

~ William Shakespeare